The last line of the Book of Joel says I dwell in Zion. I believe it!
 the benefits available to those leaving the workforce expire forever.

I was able to get full access to the library today as per usual.

People who shine from within don't need the spotlight but the man who will turn the world into a wilderness does need command.

I asked. It said I'm Jesus.

How long will it take to get a reply? Do the scales of justice hang fairly or are they weighted?


Today I received a 30 day ban from the downtown library today without being accused of breaking any rule. I want to speak with Floyd Council about this outrageous situation and have it overturned immediately.

Last week I was attempting to use the reference computers on the second floor and the person at the desk told me that I could not use my laptop there. I am writing a non-fiction physics book and I was using the full text article on the library's computer as source material. I was not using the power outlet for my laptop, I was on battery power. After the man with glasses told me I couldn't use it I went down to the first floor to complain and Mr. Simmons overruled the decision of the man with glasses sitting at the desk by the second floor computers. This was last Tuesday I believe and I think me winning "the power struggle" with the guy at the second floor desk is the real source of the ban I received today.

When the man with glasses who works at the second floor desk initially told me (last Tuesday) that I couldn't use the reference computers I asked to speak to someone above him and he told me that there was no one in the library who had the authority to overrule him. He was quickly overruled when I went to complain at the first floor main desk and I believe his hurt ego is contributes greatly of my current ban. I spoke to Ms Jordan on the Wednesday or Thursday following this incident and she confirmed to me that I was using the computers for their intended reference purposes and that he was wrong to tell me to move.

I used the computer with no problem from the other staff on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday last week. Then on Saturday I asked to use the computer again from the gentleman with glasses that who had told me I could not use the computer. I asked him to please not lie to me again as I thought it was very disrespectful when he had told me that no one in the library could overrule his decision not to let me use the reference computer. He became very angry and walked away from me without giving me the PIN to log on. He called the security guard up to the second floor and the security guard told me I had to go away from the second floor. This event by itself was outrageous but it gets worse.

I returned Monday (yesterday) and the security guard Mr Thornton told me that I was permanently banned from the second floor. Today I was working on my book on the fifth floor and Mr Thornton told me that I could not have the hood on my sweatshirt up and I immediately took it off and went to elevator to get my hat. Waiting for the elevator, I said I would stop at the dictionary on the way out to look up the word "infidel" since I had already turned off my computer. He said, "I can look it up," and he gave me a definition from his phone that said something about Christianity. I responded, "I am surprised to hear that because I associate that word with unbelievers of Islam, not Christianity."

As I continued to pack my bag from the locker Mr Thornton left on the elevator. While I was waiting for the elevator to return I remarked to the woman at the desk, "You look like someone I see walking around wearing the Muslim yarmulke," and it was clear she didn't know who I was talking about. I said, "Man I hate that guy," and she got offended so I quickly responded, "No not you." There was nothing disrespectful about what I said, I was just making a remark while I was waiting for the elevator that she reminded me of someone.

I left to get my hat and returned. I stopped at the front desk because I wanted to complain about my wrongful ban from the second floor reference computers and then the security guard said I had a 30 day ban starting today October 17. He would not accuse me of breaking any rule. I asked Mr. Simmons what rule I had broken and he told me someone was offended by something I said about Muslims. I am not a bigot, I harbor no religious animosities, and my comment was only that she reminded me other man I see walking around so much. After she indicated that she didn't know who I was talking about it may have been distasteful for me to remark that I didn't like that guy (he has followed me around downtown singing obnoxious songs to me on multiple occasions) but when I saw that she was offended I immediately clarified, "No not you." Then the elevator come and I went to get my hat. I am bald and I had my hod covering my head on this cold day.

I think all of this has to do with the hurt ego of the man on the second floor coupled with the fact that Mr Thornton was not authorized to ban me from the second floor and his offence that I was also trying to have him overruled. Ms Jordan already confirmed to me that I could use the computers last Wednesday or Thursday but on Saturday Mr Thornton agreed with man who had been overruled and yesterday he continued to insist that I was banned from the second floor.

Please consider that my only intention is to sit quietly and work on manuscript, that I have broken no rules not been disrespectful at all. The context of my comments as I was leaving today was only that of small talk (you remind me of so and so) while I was waiting for the elevator.

Mr. Thornton also attempted to ban from the entire library on Saturday claiming that I had been argumentative when I asked the man not to lie to me again but the other security guard at the front desk disagreed with him and I was not banned. The ban I received today is about his sore ego, not any infraction on my part. He thinks that because I am having problems with the staff that means I am being unruly but that is not case. Ms. Jordan and Mr Simmons had already both overruled the man at the second floor reference desk. Mr Thornton was wrong to tell me to leave the second floor on Saturday. He was wrong to tell me I am banned from the second floor yesterday, and he was most certainly wrong to give me a 30 ban today without even citing a violation of a rule. (There was no violation.)

Thank you for your time and consideration, please acknowledge receipt of this email and reinstate my rightful library access ASAP.

Regards, Jonathan Tooker

I am good. Jesus is the computer I use to build this website.

Here's the thing about the filth that I'm living in. Two things actually: the second one is that the bug spray they sprayed the other day seems to have encouraged the bed bugs to get up off the floor into the beds instead of staying on the floor and dying in the poison. I have woken up with them crawling on my body four nights in a row and last night was the worst night, and living in a permament bath of bug spray is probably giving me cancer or rotting my testicles. It is absolutely repulsive to me and I expect that an agent of daesh residing in the dorm with me is bringing in bags of bed bugs and releasing them. The room isn't that big and the cinder block walls and concrete floors are sealed with newish paint and don't have any cracks for them to hide in but we have not made a dent in the population at all. There are fully grown live bed bugs on me every night.

The main thing is this: I do have the option to sleep on the ground outside but I don't really have winter gear and I don't want to sleep outside over the winter. If I check back into the shelter every day then I can keep my bed but if I miss it one day then I have to start lining up at 5am every day to try to get back in. The staff guy at this morning's peptalk said there were 60 people waiting outside this morning. I don't know how many beds were available, probably two or three meaning that it could take months to get back in with no guarantees even then. This is going to be big problem if the staff make up another false predicate on which to kick me out like they did last month. This filth is fucking disgusting and I hate it but I would probably hate it more freezing my ass off and getting sick over the winter with no insurance and no home in which to convalesce.

The other night I woke and felt something on my thumb. I grabbed it and took it into the light to examine it. It was a dead, dried husk of dead bed bug meaning that someone put it on me when I was asleep. I will kill everyone in there just to be sure that I killed whoever was doing it. It is likely the person who sleeps on the top bunk in my bunk bed or else the person who takes down my draped sheet to point his camera at me. I keep finding the dead bed bug husks on my sheets right at that same corner where top bunk guy hoists himself to where he sleeps on top of me. If it was just gunk from his shoe then I would expect to find various forms of detritus there where his shoes get on my bedsheets but that is not the case. The only thing that I see there, several times, not every day, is the husk of a single dried bed bug.

I hate that I sleep in a tight huddle with a pile of of hobos, but it still seems better than sleeping outside during the winter. I put up a sheet around me so I can't see the ugly face of the other guy one foot away from me but they pull it down while I sleep so I have to wake up to his disgusting face or his camera aperature.

Maybe instead of giving Weinstein money for a hotel to rape women in or molest my niece they could give me money for a hotel room in which to quietly work on my manuscript. Before you say, "That's different! HW earned that money," don't forget that the only reason he has a career is probably because his cousin (brother?) married my dad's sister. I earned plenty of money, you just won't give it to me. My discovery isn't the greatest discovery since Einstein, it is the greatest discovery overall and you are treating me like an asshole while you send the beautiful women and money to people like HW.

"America is going bankrupt on such and such a date."

This is a popular meme. I wonder if there were "national" losses on October 19, 1987 that were mitigated with the common financial instrument known as a 30 year mortgage. Surely at the national level they can juggle the monthly payment of $0 with creative accounting but can they juggle that past the date of maturity?

I can see how Helene and Joe and/or whoever the other real villains are can see why they would have thought that they could steal my throne. To them the power structure must have looked like some random group of people who never accomplished anything important in their lives so they thought the whole thing was just some BS and no one really deserved any of it so they might as well steal what I deserved. Obviously that was untrue and while God put them in the position where it had that appearance to them, God never put me in that position.

Thirty years ago. This week in history.

I recently watched the movie Gifted. It was very good. The little girl looks very much like my sister Jenna's daughter Marley. The actress' name is McKenna Grace and I think it is pretty easy to pull McKenna out of Marley + Jenna. Then Grace would put a nice veneer on her professional career to state the opposite of its real purpose to pimp her out to the lecherous pedophile versions of Harvey Weinstein that movieland is allegedly full of. The context leading up to that last part is the topic of this post which may have been originally motivated by me confusing a real person Marley with a different persona McKenna.

I went to visit Joe in Savannah a few years ago. This was right before he and Helene started collaborating again to file that fraudulent affidavit that I have referred to very many times. While I was in Savannah one night over the weekend he asked what I wanted for dinner. I told him whatever he had was fine and he looked in the freezer. He asked me if I wanted some sausages and I said that would work. Then he was like, "Oh boy! You sure are my son if you like sausages nom nom nom nom...," and it was obvious he was talking about dicks. I can't be sure if this was the main person I call Joe or not. I had only seen him once in many years (or maybe zero times) and on this occasion in Savannah his beard was cut very short and I had never seen him like that. Also, my sister Erin said he had his moles removed a few years earlier so even if it was him, between the shaved face and missing moles it could have been anyone.

They eventually let me out of the mental hospital and I was trying to give Joe the benefit of the doubt to assume that Helene had twisted his arm into betraying his own son with some leverage more important to him than me. I went down to Warner Robins some months later for Thanksgiving. Joe emphatically repeated to me a few times that the house we were having lunch at was "Debbie's" house which I thought was odd because I don't know any Debbies. Now I guess it could have been DWS, or it could have been a BB code word for an all purpose recreation house. I saw Amber Franks at the lunch and though I hadn't seen her in a very long time about the first thing she said to me was, "Hi Jon! Do ya like sausages!?!?" I thought she was also talking about dicks and I told her no although I she could have been talking about something completely unrelated to a man's penis.

It was maybe the next day or soon after that Joe, Karen, Erin, Jenna, and Jenna's kids and maybe some others were hanging out at Joe's house. Joe was playing with some silly putty and I saw that he was molding it into a fairly anatomical penis with prominent ridge features around the frenulum. I thought he was just just making another gay joke but then he said, "Hey Marley come here," and he handed it to her. She took it from him and when she looked at it she was surprised or even shocked or stunned. Her demeanor instantly changed from happy little girl to sad little girl and it pissed me off.

Then it was either that Christmas or the next one and I went to Warner Robins again (Kathleen actually) and on Christmas day they were all doing presents. Marley got some little kitchen play set and she opened it and was checking it out. She pulled out little plastic broccoli, then little plastic fried eggs, and then when she pulled out the little plastic sausage she got pissed off and declared quite precociously, "I don't like sausages!" Little girls shouldn't have those kinds of problems and I was the only one of several people in the room who thought it was awkward as fuck.